For a parent, one of the biggest worries we have is if we are raising our children the right way. Aside from having a healthy, safe and happy life, we’d also like them to grow up to be responsible adults and good, if not great, contributors to our society.
So, one of the most common questions we have as parents is, “Am I raising a responsible child?”
One of the most effective ways of raising a responsible child is to reinforce their independent, responsible behaviour, as immediately and specifically as possible.
We often become distracted with work, household chores, etc., that we forget to take time to focus on what our child is doing. Sometimes, we take notice when they do something wrong. We often give our attention to them when their grades are not up to our standards, or if they haven’t done any of the chores we assigned to them and other negative behaviour that they may have shown or done to us. Thus, our kids get our attention for their negative behaviour and less on their positive ones.
By focusing more on what your kid has done right, it signifies as a reward for your child. It encourages them to do the right thing when faced with similar situations because they know and feel that they’ll earn that reward again.
For example: “Wow, I’m really impressed that you put your toys back in their box even if I didn’t ask you to. That really helped me a lot. Thank you.”
Be sure to catch your child or children doing good things like taking care of their younger siblings, fixing their bed or even tying their own shoe laces.
You can even buy one of those magnetic good behaviour star charts, so that at the end of each week you can give them rewards for their good deeds like going to a movie together or eating at a restaurant of your child’s choice or anything fun and exciting for your children.
This way, you can make them feel that doing good deeds will not only make them feel good, but it also made your life, as his or her parent, a lot better.